i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
