Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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