and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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