he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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