okay pat passed out under dana's car
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
