it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
