i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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