Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
