friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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