I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize