We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
