What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
