Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
