I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
