yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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