that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
