Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize
