i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
