North Korea, Best Korea!
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
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