that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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