I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
