i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
