I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
