i jhust puked up my retainher.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
