Are we in a gay sports bar?
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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