in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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