A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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