Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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