I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Randomize
