Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
