This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
