K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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