Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
