When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
