please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize