I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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