My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
