Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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