Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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