dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize