Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
