does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I smell like Dick and happiness
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
