It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
