I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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