You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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