You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
