Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
