Goodnight sugar queer
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.