Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
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