the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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