Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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